I’m not trying to react too negatively about it, but It’s back,
and being that I should be better prepared for its coming is neither here nor
there. Of course, I’m talking about winter: and no matter how well prepared I
am for the physical and logistical rigours of the season, like any savvy
Canadian should be, ultimately, I am never prepared for it psychologically,
despite having lived here all my life. Things like the extra darkness, the
featureless snowscape, the extra work shoveling and blowing away accumulations,
the treacherous driving from idiots who aren’t adapting to slick road conditions,
and the augmented stretches of isolation and being penned indoors are already
getting to me, and we are only four days into the season since the snow came. Knowing
that there is 32 times that of a duration yet to endure until spring isn’t making me
any more cheerful. I don’t feel anymore thankful or blessed in knowing that Halloween
was snow free, and it could have come much sooner by one or two weeks, which is
not uncommon in these parts to expect. It’s just here, and I have no will to
deal with it. It’s going to be hard to find pleasure in this one. The title
above is more of a note of sarcasm than anything.
Q1. How is this going
to be an even more challenging winter?
A1. What’s even more foreboding about it is that now that I’m
a member of the Condo board, I’ve been bestowed some responsibility of assuring
snow removal around the building on days like these; dealing with the gray areas
of how responsibly the owners and the people contracted to
remove it for us are going to interact. To do one home is enough, to be responsible an entire building
complex is another thing. Plus, along with dealing with some residents and
board members, some of whom are bickering with each other, and being caught
between their petty conflicts, doesn’t make me enthused to pursue this endeavor.
It makes me a little regretful that I’ve yupped myself into this.
As usual, the missing of like-minded intimate female companionship is at its worst when enduring this phase of the year*.
As usual, the missing of like-minded intimate female companionship is at its worst when enduring this phase of the year*.
Q2. What do you
tolerate best about winter?
A2. Strangely enough, the cold really doesn’t bother me much
physically. Genetically, I suppose I just turned out to be a very warm-blooded
person. It’s just an element that one dresses right for. I don’t give it a
second thought or complaint about those instances, like this morning, where I’ll
march out in -30 C wind chill to help relieve the dog. The whining and
complaining everyone else does about it, and its resulting negativity, is more
what gets to me when it’s overplayed. I get grumbly when I have to remove snow,
or be forced to travel by foot or vehicle over ice, but cold temperature itself
isn’t the bothersome factor to me directly, just what results in its influence
in other things beyond me. I get pissed off at the failures and foibles of some
mechanical and technical things like cars, cell phones, and other devices that
aren’t as resilient as I am when the temperature plummets, but not with the
cold itself. Personally, I find brisk, cold air cleansing and purifying. I’m
one of those weirdos who favours an extremely cold day over an extremely hot
one. I can dress better for a really cold day; I can’t undress further for an
extremely hot one. If I ever find it too cold for my personal liking, it’s just
a good excuse to have a hot bath, or use the sauna, or enjoy some tea or soup.
Q3. What are your
personal betterment projects going to be for the season?
A3. I’ve sorted things out to the following.
1.
Language project – Learning (some) Russian. What
more appropriate language is there to learn in the harshest and most bitter of seasons
such as this? I’ll expound more on the reasons why and my progress in future
entry.
2.
Cooking – Becoming a better saucier. To take ordinary cuts of meat and vegetables and elevate
them to another level of amazing with a simple formulation of a sauce seems to
be worthwhile doing. I’m reckoning on learning about 20 – 30 different sauces,
dips, and glazes during the season.
3.
Studying – I have a big, stupid hoop to jump
through with some required courses. It’s actually a form of hell and punishment
to me, and a reminder of collective ineptitudes which, unfairly, other parties
aren’t being held accountable for. But, I’m challenging myself in creating some
weird and wild mnemonic systems to help me remember this stuff, which I can
hopefully transfer and apply to other things more meaningful and valuable to me.
4.
Writing better – I’m considering workshops for it.
5.
Continued involvement with my Union
Q4. What fitness and leisure
are you going to try to pursue more of?
A4. Things like:
1. X Country Skiing – If there is an ideal weekend
for it. I might travel up to Elk Point to experience the trails there.
Otherwise, I’ll try to keep regenerating my lung tissues with the circuits here
locally. Running on icy streets and sidewalks is too much of a risk given that
I need non-sprained ankles and unbroken legs for work.
2. More sauna time – and with that, to pass the time
better while sweating out toxicity in there without boredom, it seems fitting
to read . . .
3. More Scandinavian crime fiction – I built up a
rather large extensive syllabus of books by Nordic writers. After reading a
few, I totally get why people have commented that I think more like a Northern
European than a Canadian.
4. Shooting Nazis – Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus, a video game, has been released. I really don’t
want to offend my German friends after saying this. Please remember that I’m shooting at Nazis, not the good Germans. The first-person shooter gameplay for
this series is awesome, and I’m sure I’ll need some form of quasi-destructive cathartic
release of anger towards something representing oppressive evil sometime
throughout this season. I wish I knew more people who like to play board games
and cards; I would welcome that too. As for now, the dog is lousy at dealing
cards, and doesn’t really have a grasp on how to play chess or backgammon.
5. Designing and building furniture – mostly shelving
and table options (solutions).
6. Cocktail Bar Development – gradually accumulating
the essential ingredients for a fuller and varied personal mixology lab
experience. If I can’t have quantity, I at least want quality on the minimal
level.
Q5. Let’s end with
being positive, what are the better or favourite sensations of winter that you
enjoy?
A5. Sensations, as in what appeals to the five senses, could
be summarized thusly:
1. Sounds – or rather the absence of it when the
first snow comes. Walking outside in the darkness on the morning of the first
snowfall of winter, where the light snow absorbs all acoustical aberrations. On
the opposite side is listening to blizzard blowing outside whilst being with a
warm beside warm, crackling from the fireplace. It’s the winter equivalent of
listening to thunderstorm for me, which I also find pacifying. The only time
I really appreciate classical music is during winter. Ella snoring by my feet
after a long cold walk, either her effort to warm up, or to warm me up.
2. Textures – the mass of a super heavy quilt
draped over me. This is only appreciated on the super cold days of course.
3. Smells – Birch firewood burning, conifer trees
(the only non-dormant plants during the season; a good whiff of pine sap is
intoxicating), fresh bread baking and soup cooking, any incense that masks months’
worth of smells of kitchen grease, other malodorous stenches and other volatile
organic compounds (from not just my suite, but others’) that get trapped inside
because you can’t really open the goddamned windows for fresh air for the risk
of freezing the pipes.
4. Sights – Hoarfrost, like everything outside gets
encrusted with diamonds after a good freezing fog. Christmas lights, or any
extra light that brightens the evenings before and after solstice.
5. Tastes – For some weird reason, I tolerate red
wine better during winter than at all other times of the year. As forms of
alcohol go, ordinarily red wine seems like it is to me like what Kryptonite is
to Superman. Anything fat and sugary is more pleasurable on an exponential
degree during winter. If the only feast I had for Christmas was Butter Tarts, I’d
be happy with that. I drink more coffee and tea during winter as well, perhaps
to trick my brain into making the cycle of daylight longer than it really is.
*- I’m not going to be prideful, or be feeling ashamed, or
hiding anymore about the fact that at times I get terrible spells of feeling
weaker and vulnerable about being very lonely. Winter here is
the worst for experiencing that, but some how I endure.
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