As it is now, one small thing of novelty
that I’m enjoying, and that is motivating me while I run, is a new set of Bluetooth
wireless headphones. I love them. I bought them with a gift card I won in a
draw. Knowing that I got them for free also puts a spring in my step. Listening
to my progress stats, podcasts, and music without a bothersome cord dangling
and tangling all around me admittedly is a nice liberating convenience. The
only other bothersome thing to lose that’s flipping and flopping in front of me
is whatever gut and man-boobs that I have left that were starting to sprout up after
such a miserably idle and crippling winter/spring. Sorry for that tidbit of TMI,
but in another couple weeks at this pace they’ll hopefully be absent as well. The
more pressing need now is the conditioning and improvement of performance of my
lungs and heart. If I don’t get those back, all else is in vain. They do seem
to be getting better though, thankfully.
My other technical indulgence that I’ve
been really liking is my new tablet computer, which I’ve been noodling around with
and using to write this entry. I don’t know why I didn’t think of getting something
like this sooner. It’s weird that my non-tech-savvy parents have had one of
these long before I did. It is that perfect thing for times when lugging around
a laptop is too cumbersome, or when a smart-phone app seems too miniscule and
straining to my eyes. I also really hate typing with my thumbs. The touchscreen
stylus mode it has is quicker and easier for me to interface than typing. When
I get too bogged down by the wretched task using of my hunt and peck style of typing
it limits and impairs my flow of thought and natural expression. I’m amazed to
see that this thing can even decipher my
chicken scratch! I’ve tested it to the degree of trying to fool it with using
special characters [$, €, ¢, £,] and it seems to know its shit. What it doesn’t
register very well though is accent marks, like umlauts and various others (á,
ä, å, â, etc.). It is exactly the gizmo I’d want to have with me should I ever
wish to commit to exploring the other grand things I’ve been scheming.
The scheming I’m referring to is a result
of a harsh realization. Last week, on a day reserved for cross-training, I took
a long walk up to Nutana, and made time to rendezvous with my friend for
coffee. The last thing she asked me about in our conversation was how I was going
to spend my holiday time for the year. I honestly had no answer for her about
that. I was embarrassed to admit that I had already cancelled some vacation time
I had booked off to attend some other Union affairs. I started to get uneasy
thinking about it. The whole downhill slide with my health has been no doubt
due to a failure to look after my own interests and needs. Constantly sacrificing
my personal holiday time and energy for fixing problems and other things I see
as bigger than me, or not making an effort to do anything meaningful with time off
is all part of the same pattern. I realize that even after a serious brush with
something nearly fatal months ago hasn’t really smartened me up to make better choices
and use of my free time. I suppose (know) I was trapped in a malaise of not
feeling my personal best to really find energy and stamina to do other such
things beyond work, but now as this is starting to change; so is my attitude. I
already snuck into a couple travel agencies to piece together some sort of
package for stuff related to the sorts of things I noted in The Dream Circuits
entry. That’s for a long term plan; right now I’m trying to plan on something
more immediate for a getaway.
Canada Day is coming soon, and I have a
week off for holidays. Both instinct and desperation are telling me to hit the
road for a while, even if it’s just a daytrip to some place novel, now that my
car is fixed and more roadworthy. As tempted as I am to stay put and save up
more money for a proper flyaway vacation, I realize that’s just another way of
squandering away precious time.
As for now, my compass needle is still
spinning. I still don’t know where it is that I’ll be heading to; I do know I
won’t be crossing the border to the states. It also seems senseless to plan to
do any camping up North with the fire bans and random evacuation warnings happening
because of the wildfires. There is still no rain in the forecast for that week,
so the risks are just increasing as it gets drier. There are plenty of other
crazy little sight-seeing objectives to target within the province that I
haven’t seen yet. However, they are scattered all about. So, it’s unlikely that
I’ll know what my tour plan will be until the last second before I leave.
On
the bright side, spontaneity always makes things interesting.
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