Abstention Project 2: February – Temperance

 “It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.” - George Burns

“Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors ... and miss.” - Robert Heinlein

Prelude: My last drink before this challenge – Date: January 31^st. I’d say that I really deserved this one, and thus had to make it special. Beverage of choice: Single Malt Scotch on the rocks (Jura), a double, pulled from my stock. I consumed and enjoyed it consciously, in a manner that allows it to linger and flirt with my senses to the max, as I always do with scotch. It was enjoyed after coming home from a good and convivial Union facility meeting earlier in the evening. A private and silent toast was made in recapping my day, to thank whatever Creator we have for allowing me to witness the rare and spectacular Blue Moon eclipse earlier that morning, to the much welcomed end of a month that was quite taxing to me in many ways, for (so far) lasting through exposure to sick people without getting ill myself, to a new and happier phase of life for a retired co-worker, and also for a moment to offer some thoughts and prayers of peace and solace to a soul that passed today, a person for whom we gave care to, who will now suffer no longer.

I’m probably shocking some people who think they know me better with my acceptance of a challenge like this. Drinking is certainly a fact of my life, and although I’m honestly not a lush, nor fall anywhere on the heavy side of doing it, I still can’t deny either that after any particularly taxing, stressful, and drama-laden day, that one potential inclination after coming home and trying to put such days behind me may be to relax with a beer or cocktail sometimes. Still, it’s not a frequent or automatic first response; and thankfully, I’m not having too many of days like those anymore where it could be. The truth is that my drinking has already declined markedly since November 2014, because after that date I needed to be mindful that over-imbibing to levels which I could have previously happily tolerated before that time can now lead to some serious complications. I can still drink daily if I wanted to, but within a limited range of moderation, of course. I’m not a barfly, but I do poke my nose into such places the odd time when I do get those rare urges to crawl out of my shell, and at least pretend to be social.

My overall opinion of exercising temperance is as such - I don’t look down on people who choose not to drink, nor do I pressure them to join me whenever I do. Their choice and their reasons, be they medical, or moral, are their own and respected. If they teetotal, I often do comply with accepting a non-potent potable as a refreshment in their company. My non-drinking friends that I have (I have more than just one of them), don’t judge me harshly just because I do drink every now and then. If it’s not a vice for which one totally abuses or allows to be an all-encompassing obsession in one’s life, I don’t regard it as one to totally discount the better parts of a person’s entire character for. However, I don’t put up with the sanctimony of others trying to tell me how inherently worthless and sinful I am because I like the odd nip now and then. I think can recover more easily from drinking than they probably can from being stupid from whatever puritanical religious or moral platform they are pontificating from. I’ve witnessed such confrontations before between casual social drinkers and some hardcore temperance adherents: be they Christian, or Muslim, or Buddhist, or ultra-purist vegan atheist hipsters, or whoever else takes a staunch unwavering stance against alcohol. If a person like this chose to engage with me this way, I would honestly attack back. Not by showing anger, or being rude, but by being tough on them with simple logic. I have a canned response against that sort of self-righteous approach. I would ask them which of the two people they would rather have being the major player in governance and setting a future course in the history the world: a determined sort who is an absolute teetotaller vegetarian, who is artistic and who loves animals; or a steadfast guy who rigorously defends and inspires his people, but also tends to occasionally overuse alcohol. If they respond with the vehement and absolute support for the former mentioned teetotaller, I would then ask them why their right arm isn’t shooting up in front of them with a Nazi salute after they answered that way, because I’d then indicate, that by their flawed thinking, that they then would have rather liked to have seen Adolf Hitler emerge victorious from the Second World War instead of Winston Churchill*. I do confess that I’d get a sense of schadenfreude as I’d watch them try to process this factoid, with the gears of cognitive dissonance grinding in their skulls. However, I’m not so spiteful as to disincline myself from the challenge of not drinking for a while, although I did get more selective as to when I would commit to this process than with the other abstention projects.

Alcohol doesn’t necessarily have to be bad for you. If one is physically/genetically well-suited enough to tolerate and metabolize it, there are countless medical reports out there expounding benefits of using it (in moderation). It was funny - back at my last physical when my blood work results were being reviewed with me by my physician. After already feeling sheepish after confessing to my doctor my steady decline in healthier food choices, he leaned towards me, raising an eyebrow, and said, “You drink beer regularly, don’t you? I would guess some sort of unfiltered micro-brewed or craft brand?” Shocked to hear him correctly identify and get that specific about my habit of homebrew consumption just from my blood sample, I was then noticeably rolling my eyes, automatically thinking dreadful thoughts of something preachy and prohibitive coming along for me; another possible loss of one of the few pleasures I have in life. I was then stuck there trying to think about I was going to dance around the next questions of how much and how often. Instead, he shocked me again by just saying, “That’s good! Because there’s no other way to explain these elevated Vitamin B levels of yours with the kind of diet that you just told me about.” He said that he wished that other patients had levels that were so good. I took it as a compliment. He didn’t even warn me to drink less. In fact, he listed a limit figure off to me of what he deemed passable as moderation, that was actually higher than what I was already consuming; so long as it didn’t veer too far over into more commercial beer (where yeast nutrients get lost through filtering and pasteurization) I was OK. Still needing to be mindful of quantity of course, my choices and pattern of drinking apparently weren’t harming me now. A big sigh of relieve there.

This doesn’t happen to all non-drinkers of course, but I have noticed that among those who opt to decline or totally abstain from alcohol, that many often just more frequently pick out/abuse another socially acceptable/permissible potentially addictive neuro-chemical substance, from which they may be finding hard to part from in the same way a heavy habitual drinker would from alcohol. With the alcohol gone at a dry social event, what you’ll most likely find instead is just other more common addiction substitute modals being served, like caffeinated beverages and sugar/carb rich drinks, treats, and confections. I’m also going to try to not fall into that trap. It was interesting to study how much of a huge influence our toxins of choice played as tidal motions and memes for determining our global history, in terms of colonisations and trade economics, through one documentary series I found¹.

Mission: No alcohol consumption in any form for the entire month of February. This includes even the so called de-alcoholised wines and beers (that slop, for the illusion of drinking alcohol, is still overall pretty costly).

Exceptions: None

Reasons, Facts, and Figures:

·         Reason 1 – I’m not quitting drinking based on some new found moral reason; I do so more out of economy after processing the actual cost of it all after reviewing 2017’s expenditures from last month’s abstention challenge. It’s one more of my wasteful expenses that I could do without for a while. I also do this to establish some sort of historical baseline for myself, because I honestly don’t know what the actual longest period of being alcohol-free has been for me at any time during my life as an independent adult. I know it sure hasn’t been a whole month, or exceeded that. I don’t consume alcohol problematically, thus it has never been something that I ever had a conscious need to monitor before. I certainly don’t expect some medal for going dry for one month, especially with the knowledge that expectant mothers are relegated to go for at least nine without alcohol, with some supportive husbands joining them on the wagon for that duration. What I do expect of myself while I’m being my own experimental guinea pig is to study and learn how I may and could change by doing so.

·         Reason 2 – Generally, because I remind myself that February is the worst month of the year for me to endure: when the deepest trough of the winter blues seems to afflict me almost to my wits’ end. Little good ever comes of living around here through this month, and for this year, it is proving to be nothing else different from other past Februarys at the time that I write this. I usually encounter at least one or two crises to manage within this wretched cycle of 28 days. Thus, this month doesn’t need to be miserably accentuated or worsened further through consuming a neuro-chemical depressant. Drinking around this time of the year obviously doesn’t accord to the overall year’s mission resolution of somehow trying to be happier.

·         Reason 3 – Because I didn’t want to do this challenge next month, and not be able to enjoy a couple pints of Guinness for St. Patrick’s Day in March. Nor would I want to be doing this in May, when the much beloved and anticipated Top of the Hops event comes to town (a beer, wine and spirit expo that is a great beginning to my summer), and any part of a hot summer without some cold beer would seem a little too unnatural for me.

·         Reason 4 – There is a movement going on to try going dry for the month of February to support cancer research. I could be on board for that.

·         Reason 5 – Alcohol is the next most toxic substance that I willingly take into my body. See next month to find out what the worst is. It would probably do me some good to have a bit of a prolonged break from it and monitor for some of the potential physical and mental changes from not imbibing, if any.

·         Reason 6 - Memory Skill Retention/ Improvement – Given that I live alone (and may possibly die alone), I have no one else around to pester and rely on to keep track of things and life tasks for myself. It’s perhaps the other reason I task and trouble myself to write out stuff like this through blogging: because these entries serve as guideposts in my own life, and without any one else around to remember any of my life for me, this is all I have left to show and prove that I once existed, or at least show in all honesty the character that I once had sometime down the road should I ever start showing signs of slipping gears cognitively. Being more proactive in keeping up with brain fitness is a more important priority for me to be mindful about than it is with most other people who are coupled. I can’t afford to be declining into cognitive impairment and decay with things like dementia as I age if I want to still live independently in my senior years. Using brain training apps like Luminosity™, puzzles, or playing the odd video game with heavy emphasis for remembering maps and spatial orientation may be beneficial. Using time like this right now to make efforts to find the words to chronicle things through writing, and learning alternate languages is a help also, at least on a lexical/language level of memory skill retention and intelligence. If alcohol is indeed a great impairment for all these things, I could stand to learn other ways to be content with using less of it.

·         Random Fact 1 – The city I inhabit, Saskatoon, was originally founded in the latter 1800’s as a Methodist temperance colony. I guess that didn’t work out so well for them, seeing how now the Broadway area, the original site of the settlement, has one of the bigger concentrations of bars, taverns, and licensed restaurants in the city.

·         Random Fact 2 – February is Roll up the Rim Month promotion from Tim Hortons, where my money ordinarily used on liquor can be gambled with in getting a possible prize by consuming more of their coffee. You have to hand it to Tim Hortons: they took the shittiest month to be alive in Canada, and turned it into a coffee lover’s dream, although very much exploiting the strained hopes of their customers through a contest to sell more coffee by getting people to wander outside into the frozen misery to get it, for the odds of winning a big ticket prize that possibly match those of surviving a nuclear war. I can’t tell if this is brilliant marketing genius, or a sick and sadistic cruelty. Because that’s what you want around here: to keep being depressed during this season and be yet even more awake and alert to reflect upon it <sarcasm>.

·         Random Fact 3 –Initial temperance movements in the early 1800’s in Britain weren’t even meant to outlaw drinking at all, but just to control it to limit public intoxication, associated more the evils of “strong drink”, i.e. distilled alcohol like gin, rum, and whiskey. The initial movements didn’t even exclude all alcoholic beverages. Non-distilled fermented drinks, like beer, wine, and cider, weren’t considered to be in the same league as “strong drink” and were fine, initially. Those were even promoted more for consumption to dissuade the working man away from using spirits. However, as the Industrial Revolution took hold, and demanded a more punctual and efficient workforce, it placed less tolerance for workers being hungover on any form of alcohol, and temperance was then redefined to mean no alcohol at all, and this is when social and religious promoters of temperance and prohibition movements gained some leverage (Party-poopers!). As temperance movements grew in momentum, the institution of afternoon tea also took hold in Victorian Britain, to accommodate for their caffeine habit from their other substitute addictive beverage, along with the addictive substance of sugar to add to it, as trade for both commodities and mass production to process and refine them began to flourish in the empire. Their temperance movements also had no problem introducing things like laudanum (an opiate derivative) to cure people of alcoholism and delirium tremens, and cocaine was used as a supposed treatment for liver disease from alcoholism. Addictions don’t really stop; they just change forms. As easy and as tempting as it would be for me to opt and appreciate the earlier definition of temperance, I decided to commit to the complete disuse of all alcohol for this month.

Substitution Materials, Activities, and Alternate Behaviours:

·         Kvass – A carbonated, grain-based drink to serve as my substitute for beer; it’s also mildly healthier than pop is. Though technically a fermented beverage, it is a probiotic elixir made with a dominant lacto-bacillus culture, not primarily yeast. The homemade stuff is very low in alcohol (a fraction of a percent by volume), while the commercial stuff has no alcohol in it at all (however, the trade off is that it’s also then typically sweetened, sterilized, and filtered of any probiotic benefits). I’ve been using the latter. My source for it in town is Slavianka, a Ukrainian and Russian food shop.

·         Milk – Moo juice, beneficial because of the added boost up of vitamin D: good to have extra of for this time of the year.

·         Clamato juice – My favourite virgin cocktail is a V-Caesar. Again, as it isn’t a sugary drink, it’s a healthier alternative than pop or other fruit juices.

·         Lemon Water/ Mint infused Water – Detox essentials

·         Tisanes – Herbal tea hot drinks, trying not to swap lessened alcohol with too much increased caffeine intake.

·         Social venues centred around coffeehouses, if any such things exist here.

·         The Winter Olympics

·         Exercise at home and skiing

·         Scheming and planning for next month’s project

Feedback Mechanisms:

·         The number of emptied liquor bottles shouldn’t change in my recycling bin between Feb 1^st and Feb 28^th

·         Weight change (due to over/under consumption of other things in lieu of booze)

·         Clarity of mind, sleep changes, regained energy, etc. (see below)

Violations (Stakes and Penalties): Opening and consuming from any bottle of liquor during this month means a monetary fine, a donation equal to the value of the retail price of said bottle of liquor**** to be made out any one of the many wretchedly despicable and awful institutions I’d hate to support with any monetary funding: i.e. any of the several ridiculous ultra right-wing-conservative, anti-science, anti-union, political movements out there (including this current provincial government). The penalty amount is tripled if any of that liquor has been acquired through any of the new privatized (non-SLBS) vendors.

Progress: It would probably just be easier for me to recap and summarize this effort by focusing on a week by week progression through the month, mostly confined to the weekend activity since most of my drinking is confined to Friday through Sunday anyway, outside of my work hours.

·        Feb 1^st – Feb 7^th: Every day has had a notice an extreme cold warning from the Weather Network during some part of each day. Thursday, uneventful . . . and dry. Tuned into TV and texting Friday evening, felling asleep on my chesterfield (getting old) – no booze then. Initial INR test done Saturday morning (1.9). Bought some groceries after my shopping hiatus. Devoted energies to restocking my kitchen, processing a lot of stuff in a manic fashion. I admit right now that this was no doubt due to too much coffee in the morning, followed by too much sugary kvass. The combination of the two seemed to have worked on me physically like a two-stage rocket fuel system. If I had a beer or two, I may have levelled out; I didn’t yield though. My heart was pounding, and I was going super-hyper and crazy, barely able to keep focused. Working like mad in the kitchen to process my pantry supplies was probably a subconscious effort to clear stuff away for my next month’s challenge. I crashed hard later, followed by blogging about the previous month’s challenge. Sunday – still booze free. Monday – Ironically, I resorted to making beer (no violation can happen since it won’t be ready to consume for over a month). Tuesday – still good. On Wednesday the 7^th, I was shaken a bit with some emotional things. It was a complicated sort of paradox to process with a few strange ironies blended in it for even more awkwardness. It was a silly thing now that I look at it clearly: dealing with a sense of loss for something I never really had. It was an odd situation where no one even did anything wrong, and everyone involved was acting on the best of intentions, and there was no one to blame. I was still very harsh on myself though. Being a hapless and hopeless loser was about the kindest thing I could say for myself then. There could have been an excuse to take to a bottle as a reaction to this. But I never did that before in similar situations, so why do that now? Luckily, I’m not too impulsive by nature. Those feelings were short-lived, and maturity prevailed. It was just a thing that was beyond my control, and it was as useless to complain and lament about, as one passing day of bad weather in a week. Nothing really happened to be ashamed of, and yet nothing resulted to be proud of either. One could argue that avoiding alcohol for the week maybe was even a help for me in managing to pull my senses together to reframe things and make peace with the issue. Fate is how you are dealt the hand, but how you play the cards is choice. I chose the most honest and amicable way, because the other people involved are ones who I inherently like, and they deserved that much. I at least tried to walk my way through this with some dignity and maybe making better, trusting, and hopefully more strengthened friendships. I at least hope that they can understand that I have no resentments at all. I realize now that I didn't lose anything, but actually gained more in other aspects. The lesson itself was harsh and sobering in its own way, but it really ended better than I could have hoped for. I can’t speculate if opting to drink would have shifted my perception of the matter for the worse, even if it was used to just to allow me to somehow escape into sleep. However, I didn’t break my vow and succumb to that action. When all was said and done, things worked out for the best for everyone. I then felt quite lucky. I thank the sweet angel who helped carry me through this time, before and after.

·        Feb 8^th – Feb 13^th: Thursday – I struggled all day at work trying to keep my mind right from the insomnia I had from the unrest from the night before, trying not to trip over my own feet. No drinks taken later when I got home from work, as tempting as it was to seek that out for some sort of practical sedation. I’m glad I didn’t because, somehow, a long-lasting migraine was triggered later; I was fearing as well that I may have been coming down with the flu. It pretty much cancelled out any appetite for alcohol, plus anything else consumable for that matter. Though it was on the milder side**, it was bad enough to keep me from sleeping well, and it left me trying to function through a dulled and blurred state for many hours. Could alcohol have prevented all that misery to begin with when used at a strategically placed time? I doubt it. Was avoiding alcohol the culprit for creating an imbalance that put me in such a state. I doubt that too. And the migraine did phase into Friday - I finally fell asleep at early morning (4:00 AM), waking fitfully throughout, arising at 7:30 AM. Things relaxed head-wise fully at about 12:30 PM. I tried watching some Olympics coverage, but I couldn’t focus, and I was too still low to be primed by any interest in it. I invested some time to check out the Wellness Expo at Prairieland in late afternoon, to do something practical and proactive in dealing with what I had experienced throughout the evening, night, and day of the pain I had, plus I attended a seminar of a relevant subject for next month’s mission. The rest of evening was a boring affair of reading, watching TV, and periodically needing to rest my eyes. Nothing more potent was consumed than decaf tea.  Saturday and Sunday – I stuck to being Mr. Fix It***. It was rewarding to complete such things and clear them off a list, but they were not accomplishments to be celebrated with any beer. I joined a friend for a belated birthday lunch on Saturday after her fitness class. Even though I did kettlebells and some core work that morning, and skied in the afternoon, her workout routine makes me feel slothful and puts me to shame. Since we ate at a health food joint, it would have been senseless to ruin whatever benefits there were of dining there with alcohol, if having a drink even crossed my mind that is (which it didn’t). I skied on Sunday, through harsher conditions than the day previous. As tempting as it could have been to have a lovely frothy apres-ski pint after that laborious affair, I managed to be disciplined for all the rest of that day. Monday and Tuesday, both days uneventful after work – just watching Olympics, skiing, and taking time to install and configure a Bluetooth system in my car . . . still staying dry.  

·        Special Note, Feb 14^th: Ash Wednesday/Valentine’s Day – the midpoint of this wretched month. It started to storm with blowing snow, as well as plummeted in temperature as the workday ended, as if to correctly punctuate just how awful and abysmal such a day is for me. If Valentine’s Day had me already feeling beat up and thrown out into a crap-festered gutter in a funk of depression, the weather change came along to stomp an extra boot down on my throat to take away anything else of the remains of the day that could have been pleasurable. It was the same sort of stupid day as it is for me every year, but seemingly worse with it being even more laden with anomie and isolation as a single this time around. Except for sending out a few critical texts and responding to a couple of emails, I just kept my cellphone off for most of that day; tuning out and ignoring all other media for the day as well. I was just feeling too low in spirits to want to deal with anyone, and yet at the same time I didn’t want to be sitting around at home all evening later either; making things worse by brooding and fueling the feelings of defeatism. I also realized that it’s all well and fine for me to quit drinking at home, but to really test myself I needed to leave the beach and wade into shark-filled waters. My last month’s review had shown that I averaged between 2 or 3 visits to a tavern, or licensed restaurant per month, and I thought I would keep that frequency now. Again, fate cards dealt, but how to play them is a choice. I chose not to mope around at home. I dared myself to go to a licensed establishment, not even considering if my resolve would remain or crumble after actual exposure to the presence of liquor, in a leisurely environment. Ideally for that evening, I learned that there was the Anti-Valentine’s party at Winston’s Pub: perfect for the equivalent of the grinches of St. Val’s like me, and other singles who are in simpatico out there, who have their own reasons for loathing this observance. It was thus a perfectly acceptable place to enter alone and dine on a later supper, hopefully in peace. If I had any heart left for this Valentine’s Day, I was probably trying to put it out of its misery by inducing infarction with the contents on my pub food dinner platter: a huge prime rib burger with tasty fries, which shouldn’t have been so good given how greasy they were. However, the only ale I had there was ginger ale, plus a passable V-Caesar. At the risk of looking a little dorky to those who seen me there, I remained resolute. It wasn’t really that much fun; certainly not healthy, but it was just good to be out, even if not for the sake of being sociable, and it was probably less destructive to my psyche than rotting away idle at home alone for that evening. There were some augmented pressures during this stretch of seven days, but I ended this second week without one drop of alcohol consumed. I then thought about writing, and I asked myself, “How would Anthony Bourdain (a guy who struggled with addictions/finding sobriety) capture an evening like this in words?” I then headed on my way home and wrote this point of entry for the day as you see it here; hearing his narration veering to the crusty, smart-ass tone in my head as I write this. The only other thing I did to keep me from being buried completely in the blues was to bring to mind all the women who came into my life who have made me happy in their own special way. All of them now are either coupled already, or living far away from me, or otherwise had just saw fit not to be with me as a partner for other reasons. I extended a general greeting to all of them on social media. It was the only small glimmer I had left in me to share that evening to make something that may have looked like love shine on.

·        Feb 15^th – Feb 21^st: Thursday- I’m seeing how I’m becoming more mindful of the ways that I’m finding more alternate things to escape into in lieu of alcohol. They are listed below, some positives as well as things that were negative over-compensations: like playing video games for an obscenely long time once or twice. Another of the downsides is that I’m ashamed to say that I find myself doing is wasting more time on being entertained by more banal and frivolous things on social media and television than I should . . . well . . . more than I already usual do. It’s not stuff I’m learning much from for my betterment; I sense another future mission in the making. Instead I turned to Pinterest to be inspired and to find motivators for my next challenges and projects. I don’t want to draw out and dwell on the other trivialities of this week, except that momentum was being kept where I remained on the wagon. The truth is that throughout this month, drinking didn’t even consciously enter my mind for most of it. I didn’t crave it, nor did I look around to score the stuff on my odd weekday evening or the weekend, which is my usual frequency and pattern of consumption for it. It was a good validation to prove to myself that I have no real addiction to it. The only time I consciously dwell on the subject is when I come and sit down here to write about my activity for the weeks of this month in a piecemeal fashion. Even then, there is no urge to get up and grab any afterward. This weekend’s events included touring a giant indoor Flea Market near where I live. More skiing was done despite the wretched wind chill. After reflecting on the misery of Valentine’s Day, there followed the ultimate, bordering-on-insanity, writing exercise: crafting a good online dating profile for myself. I found that especially taxing in that I had to pull out all the stops to present myself as a suave, silver-tongued devil to compensate for me outwardly looking like some sort of rough-around-the-edges, silver-haired, goofball. As tempting as it was to have help from Comrade Vodka for some extra creative writing prowess, and to maybe make myself feel sexy somehow with some liquid confidence for that whole mess, there was none taken. Midway through that process though, I still felt hapless and hopeless, feeling nothing better coming from me to apply to it - project terminated. I had a tougher Wednesday: dealing with a couple urgencies, and trying with no success later in the day to get either tickets or company for an upcoming weekend Rush game. To be fair, I didn’t give anyone enough notice; which was just as well, because I was getting sick. But then, as if manifesting magically and mysteriously, some interesting things started to develop (see next point). Three of four weeks accomplished in staying dry.

·        Feb 22^nd – Feb 28^th: The physical changes are becoming noticeable now. I don’t know if it’s from three weeks of the detoxifying effects of the lemon infused water (later to include garlic to fight infection holistically), or if my own liver was indeed becoming healthier, regenerating, and starting to reset its function better hormonally and metabolically from the disuse of alcohol, but I’ve been having wicked surges and spells of voracious hunger midway through the waking hours of my remaining days of this month’s challenge. I’ll spare the more vivid details, but after some abdominal pain, there was evidence of my body ridding itself of old gall stones. A throat infection was afflicting me since Tuesday evening. It was a motivator to keep me from drinking actually: knowing that it would probably not only just be painful, but also dehydrating my throat further and making things worse when I don’t have much for other remedies available for me to use. Physically (before getting ill), I seemed to have a little more energy, but that may be due to a boost in metabolism from more exercise. Mentally, I don’t feel much different; still the same problems with sleeplessness at night, or wasteful times when nap attacks strike me in mid-afternoon which then corrupt my nightly sleep hygiene later. My throat worsened throughout Thursday and Friday. On Saturday, I forced myself into at least work out indoors if skiing wasn’t feasible with the throat issue, and I used the steam room for a while afterward hoping it would cook this damn bug out of me. I hopefully got rid of what I prayed would be the last of that affliction. I could have just planted myself at home for the rest of Saturday, stewing in my failure for finding company for the game that night, but again I fought this brooding-in-isolation instinct, like I did for Valentine’s Day. I was receptive to the gentle persuasion and coaxing of someone to meet up with her before she headed out on her own holiday. Her approach to me was through that very thing that I was initially going to abandon out a sense of futility. I dared myself to go, and got myself collected into the group she was in. An uncharacteristic maneuver for shy little me. She and her company were doing rounds of beer and shots while I remained steadfast on just having some ginger ale and feasting on cough drops. As tempting as it was to join them, I found an even better reason not to mess up whatever healing was happening. I managed to lose my creepy, raspy, virus-afflicted voice just in the nick of time. Throughout that evening, I ended up not being really happy at all . . . I would say rather that I ended up being quite delightfully overjoyed! Sunday – boozeless, followed by the sweetest Monday evening I’ve ever had in a long while, if ever (still no drinking). Tuesday – no booze. I hit the finish line on Wednesday, Feb 28^th and went even beyond without touching a drop of any alcohol, as I wrap up writing this on March 1^st . . . Mission accomplished!

Rewards and Final Words: Instead of viewing consuming alcohol as a problem (which it isn’t on an addiction perspective for me), the real premise of this exercise perhaps was to see what sorts of problematic things were/are entering my life that spark and trigger me to want to drink for relief. I think I have a clearer picture of what those are now. They tend to be people centred/related stressors: dealing with the (potential) loss of whatever or whoever is the precious good in this world for me, if I had to gauge things honestly. Thankfully, I’m not driven to drink by anger. Being introverted as I am most times, I really see now that if I am ever reliant on alcohol for any one thing it’s to draw me out of that shell, and sometimes that doesn’t even do the trick. Mostly though, I drink to relax, and to dare myself to be more disinhibited to find more humour in things than to really escape from them. After all, it is a big sad scary world out there sometimes. I’m also discovering that brooding for me can incite using alcohol; not usually the other way around. Upon reviewing a broader picture of life, I reconciled with another truth: that it has occurred at times that I’ve just buckled and drank out of being plain old lonely and feeling like a rejected misfit. Of my reasons for drinking, it’s the rarer occurring one, but nevertheless, it has come to pass at times that way. Upon reflection, if I’ve ever approached inebriation at times long before this exercise, it thankfully was never inching towards the side of being mean, vulgar, boorish, angry, or aggressive. These are exactly the kinds of drunken behaviours I despise seeing in other people. Sure, there are things I did during this shift to sobriety during the month that made me feel and perhaps even appear a little crazy (including writing all this as a summary as an example), but all in all in the bigger picture, that’s not even a fraction as bad as abusing a substance to give oneself a license and an excuse to be mean, vulgar, and abusive, as some people I know/knew have done. The rewards for me giving up drinking for a while are as such:

·         One reward for this period of temperance was saving the money I could have used on liquor to instead acquire myself a new passport. To welcome and invite a chance for new experiences abroad. It seemed like a prudent measure to do. I’m more compelled than ever to fly away from this place. It’s a bittersweet move though. I’ll have this thing to permit me some freedom to travel, but as things like Valentine’s Day painfully drove home, there’s no one for me to travel with. Everyone I know is coupled, or can’t afford to travel, or wouldn’t be interested in most of the places I would opt to go to on my travel wish list. *****

·         Not wasting away all my time being immersed in dejected self-loathing/self-pity for something like Valentine’s Day. Perhaps staying away from alcohol helped. I broke away from the usual annual tradition of moping and brooding around home. I also didn’t yield to doing something ridiculous for the sake of quelling loneliness. Drawing back from the past at a time when I was in a role of being a mediator/counsellor to victims, it amazes me now what kind of nonsensical abuse and torment (escalating at times to violence) people will surrender to in their domestic and intimate affairs, all in the name of being less lonely. Even though I was amongst an indifferent crowd, still alone that evening, I made better use of the alone time being in sober solitude doing some people watching.

·         The crisis level for this month, compared to other past Februarys, has been relatively low thankfully. Being more proactively focused on maintaining some soundness of mind through substance avoidance may have contributed; or maybe I was just finally lucky for a change in that regard.

·         I exercised more, getting a good sweat going to detox me, and a lot of fresh air to rejuvenate me and re-condition my lungs, forcing myself to do so even on the harsher days outside. I finally made it to doing 10 km skiing. Something impossible for me even just a month ago. 

·         Writing more, improving some skill in it; by taking this piecemeal approach to it, by exploiting kaizen (progressive shifts in improvement through small changes), it was an awakening for me in varying my style. The downside may be that I’ve been perhaps overly candid with the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly truth of it all. I won’t learn anything though if I’m not honest with myself. Communication, it seems, is always a skill I need to improve on. I’ll say now that writing with a clearer, soberer, mind can lead one to get nailed with some harder truths about one's personal reality. However, it will also give a better sense on how to deal with them.

·         I tried to renew some old friendships.

·         I lost some weight through the month (2.72 kg/6.00 lbs).

·         I became a little more mindful of what sort of private hell people with bona fide hardcore addictions must go through, especially when that said particular addiction isn’t something seedy and hidden in the back alleys of life, but right there out in front of that person at any public establishment, out in the open and ready to tempt such people.

·         The complete success in this means no penalties, thus no punishments of financing causes I don’t support, respect, or believe in.

Greatest Triumph: finding that one good final Saturday of February, where the course of the lonely hell of this month ended and actually yielded to something good, and hopefully will progress into something even better. If it was due to me following the strange winding trail of cause and effect throughout this challenge, so be it, and I’ll just be grateful for it. It didn’t need to be as crazy as a mad-cap adventure. It just involved being honest, and open, and taming and pushing past the impulse to brood, (which is hard to do when you have the mentality and predilection of a writer) and someone who could appreciate all that. I hope she will be as grateful as I am for this too.

I also realize that this trial of temperance actually isn’t going to stop 100% immediately after Feb 28^th, since there are stipulations for my next challenge in March which necessarily include disuse of most alcohol, or at least an adjusted level of moderation than from what was recently normal for me. If I had to rate the difficulty of this challenge between 1 and 10, with 1 being the least and 10 being the most challenging in difficulty, I would honestly rate it as between a 2 and a 3. Doing some liver-cleaning hopefully will give me an advantage to deal with what is coming to task in March. I’m not going to preach temperance, but I would endorse anyone who would want to give it a try for a prolonged while. If gaining some clearer insight into some matters is all you’d get from it, that’s more than worth it. I might make this a tradition for every February now.

The greater part of February was still characteristically harsh on my wits. If I could address this month anthropomorphically, like it was the dirty old malicious bastard that it always has been to me, I would tell February that it’s about bloody time that I’ve been given some reprieve from the ordinary round of nastiness. The last few days of it were a small step towards redeeming itself. I at least leave this month better than I entered it. It took patience and calm to overcome moments of obvious depression, and the will to be empathetic, forgiving, and bidding peace to not only others, but to myself as well. Alcohol itself, or rather the lack of it, didn’t do much to change my innate character. Life was just as challenging for me without it. I am thankful that the task wasn’t too hard to commit to. However, given next month’s challenge, and the outrageous amount of prep and planning for it, I don’t think it will come anywhere close to being as easy as it was for this month . . . 

Bibliography and Resources

1.       Addicted to Pleasure – (BBC production) seen on Netflix, hosted by Brian Cox

*- “I have taken more good from alcohol than alcohol has taken from me.” - Winston Churchill

**- Although it is hard to differentiate what is “milder” in severity with such a thing. It’s like saying that getting hit by a bus is relatively milder in severity than getting hit by a train.

***- Using some hacks to fix and refurbish a broken office chair, rewiring my entertainment centre, editing and reprogramming variables in the script code of a spreadsheet. 

****- If it’s a beer, then the fine is the SLBS retail price of a 12 pack of that same or corresponding brand. 

*****- This was written prior to Feb 24^th ; I will hope that the dynamic will change now where I’d be able to retract this. We’ll see.

Abstention Project 1: January - The Shopping Moratorium

“If men liked shopping, they'd call it research.” - Cynthia Nelms

“A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist.” - Franklin P. Jones

Prelude: The post-Christmas holiday spending hangover is a good enough excuse to allow one to commit to doing this project first. Admittedly, I don’t really dig shopping to begin with, so it’s probably the easiest and most fitting one to have for the inaugural challenge of the dozen. On January 8^th I realized that I went the whole first week of the year without doing any extra shopping beyond essentials, so I thought I’d just continue for the rest of the month. The crappy winter weather of January doesn’t inspire or motivate one in moving too far away from the comfort of home either, it becomes easier to opt not to go through any trouble to frequent any shopping centre, or anywhere else where one can spend money, and thus makes it easier take on a personal crusade of anti-consumerism. Along with the (futile) measure of trying to avoid contact and exposure to people who were stricken with colds and influenza, and trying to avoid getting sick myself, I also put myself on a push back against covetous greed and affluenza.

Mission: To spend absolutely no money on extra things apart from my regular scheduled bill payments for the month of January.

Exceptions:

·         Fuel (only enough of the estimated amount rationed out to keep my car running until the end of the month)

·         Medical/Operational emergency expenses (if need be): e.g. cold/flu remedies*, car repairs/roadside assistance, household disasters, potential vet bills.

·         Redeeming collected points for purchases from my customer loyalty cards, and only on items absent from the home and on discount offer (an arbitrary value exploited, but no actual money used)

·         Using funds that were already allotted and loaded on a reloadable credit card (less than $50, used for one single indulgence of an online ticket purchase, it doubly served as some means to reunite with someone special (even if was for just a brief while). Somethings are worth bending the rules a bit for.

Reasons, Facts, and Figures:

·         Reason 1 – Always follow the money first: if you want to get a real sense of all other possible wasteful/destructive habits you might have that you need to change. You really have to see the categorical breakdown of where and how your finances, and thus consequently, your time and energy are potentially being squandered. This is what is called the Latte Factor¹ by one author I’ve been resourcing.

·         Reason 2 – Actively avoiding shopping for everything shows you (sometimes harshly) the reality of what you tend to covet as a consumer.

·         Reason 3 – Careless wastage makes me angry; I need an exercise like this to correct any fault in contributing to it that I may have. Mindless shopping and over-consumption creates waste.

·         Personal Fact 1 – My biggest purchasing sins: (cheaper) technology, as in poorer quality computers and peripherals, the kind that goes obsolete quicker than average. The kind bought at a bargain at clearance sales, but then have hard drives that fry out quickly, or generally lack capability in terms of speed and memory. If had I invested just a couple hundred dollars more at the time to get a higher quality/capability premium PC unit, I would have had something that would have lasted me at least 80% longer, plus I would have sidestepped the need of the extra expenses of one or two more cheap-ass PCs, or other components to replace. That’s the difference between being cheap and being frugal. I noted that as I was cleaning out and sorting stuff from my closets, I shocked myself by how much of this useless junk I have still lying around, plus all the extra useless cables and cords, plus the packaging they came in. At least I’m purging it now to go get processed at a better proper recycling facility, rather than pitching it out earlier at a time when it all would have went straight to a landfill. Another wasteful excess I’m seeing in my analysis is alcohol. I purchase too much of it for someone who brews his own beer, and for someone who doesn’t drink as often any more (see next month). My least wasteful expense category: clothing. My need to buy new clothes is decidedly lower than average. This leads to the subject of trash bound fashion. Perhaps this is the better coinage of the word trashion. We should be more like Jacobim Mugatu from Zoolander and try to capitalize on it instead of wasting it.

·         Random Fact 1 – Several thousands of tons of used clothing that are being donated to aid agencies and end up getting shipped to Africa, often end up just being incinerated or buried in their landfills there. The fact that the poorest of the poor don’t even have use for this amount of retired clothing is something to make you shake your head at for this surplus of dross. If that’s not enough to piss you off about this manner and level of wastage through reckless consumption, the next point is another fact that might further put me at risk for dissuading some from ever wanting to make any other charitable donation to Africa (specifically, the Republic of Congo) . . .

·         Random Fact 2 – One of the worst cultural examples I’ve found about fucked up priorities based on affluence-oriented conspicuous consumerism: despite living in one of the poorest regions of Africa (more than 45% of them living below their nation’s poverty line), and receiving charity in donated clothing, many Congolese men spend what amounts to more than a year’s income (up to 3000 euros/around 4500 CAD) for designer fashions like Armani and Gaultier suits, and parade around like a bunch of peacock dandy boys. And it’s not something confined to a single corrupt despot in power and their cronies and lackies, but extending to any of the men there, regardless of what occupation or social status each one has, who really don’t or wouldn’t have that kind of money at their disposal to afford this. The fact that social corruption is so rampant there assures that many of these high end fashion garments are acquired by disreputable means (theft, extortion, bribery, etc.), all for the sake of putting on airs.*** This all part of cultural institution there is known as Les Sapeurs, abbreviated from the French name from  “Societe des Ambianceurs et des Personnes Elegantes (or “the Society of Tastemakers and Elegant People” in English). Spending that kind of money to pretend being some sort of aristocrats while most likely depriving their wives and kids of food and other life essentials to do so, is one of the most depraved, disgusting, and atrocious marks of pompous, self-centred arrogance there is. It may be a holdover from whatever animistic religions they may practice there, where relics, fetish and material objects and charms are highly prized. I guess it might be a move to at least have a pretty suit to be buried in, since the average male life expectancy there is only something like 47 years. Once they are dead, it is reputed that these suits can be stolen by grave robbers soon after burial before the material gets ruined by putrefaction. Coming to a close second in terms of covetous, greed-driven, stupidity and “keeping up with the Joneses” lemming march, I find examples here closer to home. I’m talking about many of the oil patch workers around AB and SK, specifically those who dumped and sank so much of their money, and abused credit, on high ticket toys and other rapidly depreciating assets that they now can’t sell and are getting repossessed, and then had nerve to complain that they were so hard done by and “suffering” when the downturn in oil prices came and job losses happened. No tears shed for them here. According to Stats Canada, Alberta is supposed to be the richest province in this confederation, and yet has the highest household debt levels out of all the provinces of the nation compared to the national average. Sadly, Saskatchewan is doing as badly over the years in following that trend and trying to keep up with Alberta it that respect since the oil boom hit.

Substitution Materials, Activities, and Alternate Behaviours:

·         Using my stash of frozen food instead of buying more groceries, thus avoiding creating and collecting more leftovers

·         Using my food allowance at work and eating at home, no need for restaurants*

·         Instead of filling hangers, drawers, and closets, I’ve been clearing them out and reclaiming some space for myself

·         Drinking only what already remains of my brewing stock and whatever was left in my liquor cabinet (which flows into the next project)

·         Other free entertainment from multiple avenues, including finding and claiming some free collectable books from the give away table in my building

·         Exercise in my reclaimed office space, and now hopefully some Nordic skiing after work if the weather can warm up

·         Investing mental energy into learning/practicing other languages

·         More research on cryptocurrencies and investing

·         Outlining and planning for more upcoming projects for the course of the remainder of the year

Feedback Mechanisms:

·         My chequebook app. It graphed out all my spending categories and gave me an honest breakdown of what my good and bad habits were. It also showed me where savings were made through this trial.

·         My count of freezer containers of leftovers emptied (17)

·         The cleared balances on my scheduled bill and credit card statements (no biggie here, that would have been done regardless of this project)

Progress: I already have had the fastidious habit of tracking all my income and expenses long before starting this project. It’s a good foundational habit to have in place, and of course continue. However, this occasion was one of the rare few times that I’ve actually seen the weight of what my own personal inefficiencies and deficits were in terms of acquiring needless excesses. Starting the year with this project was especially important, as I said, to reckon what other things I could stand to bring under control through monthlong forbearances throughout this year. All in all, after assessing all this stuff and if gender roles were reversed, the verdict is that I’d actually be someone’s heavenly ideal of a very “cheap date” when I compare what I like to do with my free time, and what it costs for me to actually do such stuff.

Violations (Stakes and Penalties): The penalty for making any unnecessary purchases – time added on to this moratorium to commit to for each needless purchase made. A full day for each one. My 31-day abstention period for shopping really culminated into 33. The two purchases I made during the month of January that didn’t qualify as an absolute necessity: a purchase of some 50/50 tickets at a sporting event. The other was an admission fee to a fitness facility, with more time used the steam room as therapy than to actually work out. Not huge purchases, both were around $10.00, but violations all the same.

Rewards and Final Words: The material prize for me for committing to and completing this was a couple of new shirts, since I rarely shop for clothing. They are certainly not Armani or Gaultier, but they are what’s practical, cool, and comfortable for me. Cleared space, and some renewed gumption to get up and move again was another bonus. Reconnecting with frugality, listing and being cognisant about more than a hundred different ways I can spend time fruitfully without dropping a dime is always good to do too. Upon seeing a botched merger with two loyalty programs here, I reclaimed all my accumulated points afterward at the grocers before things got worse. This post-trial grocery trip ended with me spending only my loyalty points plus $25.00 secured me with enough food for my home to last for more than two months if I plan on process it painstakingly and wisely**. Another thing was managing to squirrel away a little bit of extra money to place into a reasonable risk investment, I’ll see later if that really will turn out to be rewarding or not. A shaky start, but I did give myself a few grey areas, where I could have exploited more chances to rationalize and really sabotage myself. The fact that I didn’t do that to the max is a success in and of itself. I’d say that overall I did OK for this first abstention challenge. For February’s project though, there won’t be any such flexibility like that at all. Wait and see until then.

Bibliography and Resources:

1.       Bach, David. The Automatic Millionaire (Canadian Edition), 2003, Doubleday Canada

*- Which includes the natural ones, since I can’t do a lot of over the counter pharmaceuticals any more; chicken soup being one of them, and there is no other more potent decongestant remedy form of it that I know of than whatever is in Vietnamese broth. I haven’t the time to craft it, nor can I make it as perfectly or as cheaply as any one of my favourite pho joints here in town. Getting some was the one restaurant expense I could justify making; a lesser evil than a drug-form remedy with stupefying side-effects, or possible contraindications. Without it, I’m sure I would have been a big snotty mess for more than a week.

**- Cheaper yet, and for a longer duration of supply yet if I didn’t buy any meat. More on this down the road.

***- Sure, there may be more notable and visible examples of over-the-top flamboyant, materialistic, vanity-laden, and ultimately unjustifiable and unwarranted displays, and useless squandering of wealth in places like Dubai, and other wealthy regions in the oil-rich Arab world: like sports car traffic jams, building 7 star luxury hotels and super huge malls that only very few can shop in, and the competitions of who can erect the tallest phallic symbol dessert tower, but these are people who actually already provide for their families and have the excess money to throw around and to sink into such bullshit.

Refraining and Abstaining: A New Order for the Year

“One half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it.” - Sidney Howard

It finally looks like a more common winter scene that I’m familiar with, and I’m grateful for it. There’s at least 15 centimetres of new snow that arrived since the night before last. I can finally get set to go skiing soon, and it may also help stave off the conditions for drought for next summer as well as my physical sloth during this season.

But rather than looking that far ahead, I sit here doing some review of my recent past to see what to implement for this year in terms of what could be done as measures for betterment. I’ve been so tuned into what prospects I want to invite to do such things as personal resolutions, that I often fail to account for what I should or must give up to gain them. I don’t really view myself as a person loaded with any huge quantity or frequency of bad habits that I need to drop entirely or immediately, or life-crushing deficits that I at least must correct temporarily. It’s not like I’m a person fraught with things as extreme as addictions. However, after doing some introspection after writing my first two entries of this new year, I see that there is plenty of room for improvement; for proactive efforts for better self-care. I thought I would now try things from the opposite end of the spectrum and deploy a more stoic and spartan approach through some successive eliminations of things, even if they may just be temporary.

I noted that the simple word “enough” was one thing that I was going to be mindful about. The questions to follow naturally came as: “What things do I have enough of?" (as in a adequate/great abundance of), and then contrasting that with what is really lacking around here for me, and the question “What things have I had enough of?" (as in setbacks, annoyances, and inconveniences), and gauging that along side with any potential I have to change with any material or behavioural substitutions. I also noted how tired and de-energized I’ve been since the year started. Not a good place to start off from when the general mission is to be somehow happier. A lot of that is mostly due to interference from environmental and health related issues for sure. So, it would probably do me good to make some more conscious efforts to detox in some ways. I need to organize and handle stuff like this in a rigidly hard-core and structured way.

Thus, I compiled a list of things that I’m going to actively challenge myself with abstaining from throughout the course of the year. I won’t be doing them all at the same time, just periodically for a month at a time: some at specially and specifically selected months (as with during this month of January); others at placements I randomly picked for along the course of the year. There are thus twelve such things on my list as personal prohibition trials, each will be approached and committed to with a month-long duration of refrainment. It's kind of like the same exploration/learning model I used last year for my language learning modules.

Prohibition, self-denial, acts of nonparticipation, interludes of deprivations, and measures of austerity are not the only things happening though. I’ll also be including alternate substitute material and behavioural practices in lieu of the other junk to hopefully serve as stuff to fill those voids with positive reinforcements and some manner of redemption. Maybe I'll actually glean some good habits out of this process. I will do my best to record the progress, and to see if there are any actual beneficial changes throughout. At the very least, I'll try and find some humour in it all, even when the challenges get hard and demanding.

The first round of these twelve trials will be finishing soon. I'll try to get it posted soon after month's end.

Bibliography and Resource Material:  The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges, by Rosanna Casper (2017)

Winter-ruption

Some people have the habit of immersing themselves into their Sunday morning with their coffee, and leisurely reading the weekend paper. I’m noticing that since the year began that I seem to be immersing myself into my Sunday morning with my coffee in hand, and pretending as if I were writing for a newspaper.

There were unwelcome strange things going on throughout the week since last entry, mostly confined to my personal life for me to deal with beginning the moments I came home after work on more than one occasion, but thankfully these tricky things didn’t mushroom into anything more wild or intensely serious. They included: my building almost catching on fire, another threat of infestation, and my poor little pooch getting injured. Of all those, my dog’s health was/is my greatest concern. She is healing: slower than I want, of course, but at least she’s not deteriorating for the worse. I’m happy that the week ended better with new interesting experiences, and overall soothing transitions. It has been a good weekend to shake off some of the mid-winter blues, which included crawling out of my hermit hovel for a change, and being a little more social. I got myself a ticket for sporting event, which I deemed to be a kosher purchase despite some new project ambitions, which I’ll cover more about sometime in my next entry.

I checked out my first lacrosse game on Friday evening. The Sasktel Centre arena was packed. The Saskatchewan Rush played the Buffalo Bandits. Unfortunately, the Bandits earned their team name too well, first stealing away what was an initially impressive and massive lead by the Rush, coming hard and overtaking them to come to a tie, and then stealing the game away in overtime, 16-15. An epic comeback for them (uncelebrated here, of course), and an embarrassing downturn for us. It was only the Rush’s first loss of the season though - small potatoes. It was still worth the effort to go, and I’d check out at least one more game for the season. Again, I write this next part for the benefit of my non-Canadian audience. The game originated in this nation (actually long before we became a nation) centuries ago by the Iroquois tribal first nations out east. Anthropologically speaking, it was evidence that the development of such a game was an indication of less reliance on nomadic hunting and gathering, and the preference to adopt permanent settlement and the deployment of agriculture. Leisure time appears more with the fixation of working around seasons in one place, and acting out non-lethal ways to practice martial tactics through team sports also evolves*. However, despite it being our official national sport, it fell into obscurity in our cultural scene for a long while. It lost out somehow to hockey and to curling, in terms of popularity as a spectator team sport in these modern times, or at least there has never been a Lacrosse Night in Canada televised on CBC during our nation's formative sports media years. The more novel and esoteric team sport of broomball** (another rink sport invented here, because we have way too much fucking winter to deal with) even became a more popular community sport around here during my early years than Canada’s official national sport, lacrosse. Lacrosse still has been around, but it just hasn’t really been popular as a big-time league field sport until it had been recently re-hyped somehow, and has been making a grand resurgence, thankfully avoiding a sort of extinction from our identity.

I don’t know, or couldn’t guess, as to how or why lacrosse became so diminished in popularity, and a lesser meme of the field/arena/rink team sports played in this nation to begin with. Perhaps it lacked the display of brute strength of football, or the more extreme speed and sometimes pugilistic action that ice hockey has, or perhaps it wasn’t as cerebral, or loaded with enough focused and refined, single-pointed calculated target finesse that curling has in satisfying the other end of the spectrum of stimulation through spectatorship. Sadly, I believe that it wasn’t more strongly popularized throughout our history really because white guys originally from Britain or France didn’t come up with the idea first. It looks like something that Dr. Seuss may have invented. It sometimes gets tricky to follow the plays, as the ball isn’t out as much in the open as a hockey puck is, hidden in racket netting as players are trying to deek each other out, so it can be definitely harder to track. Maybe that's why it got harder to promote and sell through radio and then television, when these media forms were in their infancy: the technical issue of reporting and recording where this elusive ball was throughout a game. The extra dimensional axis along the field of play makes it as interesting, if not more so, than ice hockey. More hand-eye coordination is involved with it perhaps than hockey in that respect. Even if I were younger, I know that I’d have a real challenge playing it. I wish success not only for our team, but also to the league as a whole.

Another newly hyped outdoor game/sport for this winter-ruption season in the city that I’m checking out this weekend is Crokicurl. You can’t get much more Canadian in a game than this: taking a table game that originated in this country, something I’ve played a few times in some dingy, up-in-the-sticks barrooms (Crokinole); a game, as with darts, where one’s prowess is tested and tempered by making it even more challenging yet for one’s fine motor skills with heavy alcohol consumption, and then making an augmented version of it to play on a post-studded ice surface using curling stones for counters. What a concept! No doubt, some form of inebriation or intoxication had to be in progress as the heads came together to create this fusion of these two games. It’s so simple, and perfect! I also can’t really believe that we’ve been so stupid as to not come up with this idea a lot sooner for around these parts. Oh well, better late than never for this heroic flash of innovation. Sponsorship for this bar game come outdoor spectacle, especially from the local brewers and distilleries, i.e., those who could have some sway in allowing drinking in public, could really help it to take off in popularity during this most wretched of the yearly seasons. Hey, and why not just loosen up a bit more about drinking outside in public in the middle of bloody winter as well for special events like this? Especially considering that things are getting lax enough around here where weed is going to become legal by next summer. Hell, I bet the newly forming cannabis corporations here may also want a piece of this sponsorship action. It might be even more entertaining watching these “athletes” trying to play this while they are completely high***. It could potentially be the new stoner outdoor winter sport (not unlike snowboarding, which already holds such a distinction), that can get more involvement and appeal from the lesser-than athletic types. It will be interesting to see how this thing evolves as another one of our national wintertime leisure activities.

It's all hype folks: a sport doesn't become a sport nowadays without it. Pulling a new one out of obscurity and making it fly off the ground with popularity seems now to be impossible to do without commercial sponsorship. 

*- Non-lethal is not always the case. The Aztecs had fully adopted agriculture and civilization too, and consequently developed their own basketball-like team sport called ullamaliztli, a game that died out right along with them. Maybe it’s popularity didn’t take off so well because the losers of the game were offered as human sacrifices to their pantheon of gods. Hard to the develop teams if they are constantly being physically eliminated by getting their hearts torn out. Let's just say that their PR folks kind of didn't give this a serious think through for promotional purposes.

**- Broomball: an ice rink sport believed to have been invented right here in Saskatchewan (first official recording of it being played is in the community of Perdue). Played sort of like hockey, except with using an implement resembling a broom to whack a ball around (hence the name, like, duh!). Comparing it to hockey is like comparing (American/Canadian) football to rugby. There’s no special padding like hockey, and specially soled shoes are worn instead of skates. You need some sure footing as you run along the ice, but you may get the advantage of some added extra traction by occasionally trotting over someone's missing teeth. It can be even more pugilistic than hockey, as I’ve seen in some goonfest matches of it in the past. Maybe it's because there’s less a lot padding to punch around, and there is a decided advantage in being able to base and balance a striking posture more easily to scrap, drift, and coldcock a guy on ice while wearing shoes rather than skates. It's what makes one who is being a broomball goon even distinctively more of a lowdown dirty psycho bastard than as such in hockey in comparison. It would be great, if not miraculous, if this actually got recognized as a sport fit for the Winter Olympics, other than seen as the lowbrow hybrid spawn of hockey/rugby that it could be. 

***- I’m sure at this point of reading this composition of crazy ramblings, that some may think that I do marijuana myself. I honestly do not. My limited alcohol consumption (because of medical reasons) is enough of a vice as it is; I don’t need anything else beyond that. Personally, my life wouldn’t change when cannabis becomes legal here, except probably dealing with issues as a steward about the grey areas when it comes to interfering with work performance in others on the job. I would treat it as a medicine (one that I probably can’t take anyway due to contraindications with my other treatments), and nothing more than that. I am, however, pro-legalization; more so for the reasons that I believe a strengthened hemp-production economy and industry makes for an inroad toward more sustainable ways of environmental and ecological preservation, and will ultimately lead to less taxed and stressed healthcare, law-enforcement, and corrections systems.