Summer Holiday 2019: Happy Thoughts

It’s ridiculously early this Sunday morning. I should be sleeping, but I can’t. I needed to do some head-clearing: both on the physical and mental level, and I’ve made the poor choice of using caffeinated warm beverages to do it. My choices for the days booked off for my summer holiday time are centred around the simple and practical reason of avoiding too much sleep-deprivation. I usually take the week around the solstice off as a “first period” of my summer holiday, because I struggle to sleep as it is, and this phase of extra daylight hours makes it worse. The other sleep-disrupting period of summer are the annoyingly noisy days of the Ex echoing through my neighbourhood, and I find it necessary to book time off then too.

As far as holiday time goes, this round is certainly not 100% satisfactory. Of course, as per usual, as it has been for the last few years, the early allotment of my summer holiday time has become muddled with bad fortune. I’ve been spending the better part of the week of it battling a super-bad, sinus cold. I won’t prattle on about that: I’m miserable enough knowing that it has already stolen quality time and energy to share with my girlfriend during her booked time off. Relating more details about it won’t make it better. I’ll only say that if I were forced to choose between one or the other, that I’ll take and endure a winter cold any day over one that strikes me in the middle of summer.

We also had a fine dump much needed rain for this region, which was most certainly welcome to help break this long stretch of drought. However, I just wish it hadn’t all come at once during this time that I’ve been off work. I really shouldn’t complain about that either because I was cooped inside all the time anyway being sick. It was a bit disappointing to miss the solstice day as it should have been for these parts: normally bright enough to be able to read a book outside until about 10:00 pm. Instead, it was so dreary that my evening lights were on turned at 11:00 am.

This time off also coincides with having to re-train myself to walk right again, with the inclusion of custom-made new orthotics. The adaptation process has been slow (slower than I want), and I can’t yet do near the amount of walking that I normally would do during this time off. The difference between using them and not using them is like night and day. There is the initial pain and discomfort, felt right to the bone and joint level, of adjusting to them to deal with. Of course, I wouldn’t lucky enough to have these things become set right during my time off, for better times in my life, but they’ll be all right for me to use for an entire day just by the time I come back to work. Whoopity- freakin’-doo!

Besides fulling shoes with high-tech composite insoles, and emptying boxes of tissues and mugs of tea, this term of my holiday time (the alone part) has only lent itself to: allowing me to grapple with necessary and practical chores and fix-up tasks, too much idleness and screen time, me being trapped in the inertia of having no energy, me struggling to think clearly with a snot-addled head, and yielding little else in regards to what I would call fun and enjoyment. I did do one thing quite successfully though: I avoided all the negativity being broadcast and deluged upon me through the television news channels and social media during this time.

Of course, the sensible mission while on a vacation is to not just be avoidant of negative crap; it should be a purposeful movement in some direction toward just being happier than one would be if one was working. It was a good time to put my head into the book I found: The Happiness Equation, by Neil Pasricha. To pull oneself out of a miserable mood, sometimes it is just plain old sensible and practical common sense measure to immerse oneself in list making, specifically a happiness list, i.e., the things that truly make you happy, grateful, or at the very least are a relief to you, and turning all your attention to building and adding on to it: a literal counting of blessings. I would encourage everyone to do such a thing. Neil has done this for himself in his book and blog, The Book of Awesome, and A 1000 Awesome Things. For me, this is the result of my own exercise of doing this (though numbered, there is no real ranked order to this list):

1. Summer (or any season, in whole or in part, when I can enjoy being outside without freezing my ass off, or slipping on ice), but I’m thinking specifically of enjoying longer days. Living at this latitude is ideal for that
2. Peace and quiet when it comes to me. I can then hear myself think
3. My girlfriend’s company: whenever she has time for me
4. My dog (the being that is the closest thing I have for a daughter
5. Dogs in general, even the more unpleasant ones are more tolerated by me than the wrong sorts of people
6. Living in Canada, a peaceful place with more freedoms and less violence and corruption then most other countries on Earth
7. Time spent with my family (parents, brothers, in-laws
8. The soothing sound of gently falling rain
9. Dining outside in the fresh air
10. A properly working dishwasher (and now knowing some tricks on how to repair one if necessary
11. Inventing a meal from scratch, and cooking it successfully
12. Leisurely bike rides along the trails by the river
13. Jigsaw puzzles, when I’m in the zone, all time stops for me when doing these things
14. Reading, and being able to read in more languages than just English and French
15.  Writing, with the same dimensions to be thankful for as the point above about reading 
16. Playing Kaiser, or other card games with my parents (either as a partner or an opponent
17. Colourful sunsets
18. Sitting by a fire (campfire or fireplace)
19.  Relaxing by watching the clouds go by as I sit outside on my deck (like right now)
20. My Union, and the great supportive staff and fellow brother and sister members in it
21. The Union conferences and workshops that I attend and learn from
22. Relaxing in the sauna after brutal, bone-chilling cold day
23. Greenhouses (specifically inhaling the floral air made by a mass of photosynthesizing plants condensed under one roof – it’s the essence of aliveness, an instant pleasure)
24. Successfully growing a plant that hasn’t instantly died in my car
25. Watching my nephews growing into the fine young men that they are
26. Super-sized sudoku puzzles (like the 16 x 16, or 25 x 25 varieties)
27. Vietnamese pho soup and noodle bowls, very comforting stuff
28. Spicy food in general (becoming fond of more types of curry)
29. Barbecued meat of almost any kind
30. The smell of baking bread, fresh homemade bread is the bomb!
31. The smell of homemade chicken broth
32. The smell of frying bacon (Canadian perfume)
33. Making beer; drinking the results
34. Sampling most types of beer really
35. Netflix, although the variety and viewing options often overwhelm me
36. The local Farmers’ Market
37. My Alt Rock and Indie music playlists
38. My Classic Rock playlists
39. Spotify and Stingray music streaming for discovering all else that’s new
40. Having enough money left after paying the mortgage, bills, fees, and taxes
41. Playing Poker (and winning at it) – a time when it feels right and very liberating to be a cocky smartass
42. Haggling at garage and yard sales
43. Finding useful free stuff at the giveaway table in my building
44. Finding a bargain on the things I like and appreciate
45. My Xbox game console, because sometimes you just must vent off anger properly, and blow the heads off a few despicable digital Nazis
46. Massages that actually soothe my knotted-up muscles 
47. Eggs, and all the groovy things one can do with them
48. The smell of incense (so many aromas to like)
49. The voice of Alan Watts, and listening to his philosophical lectures
50. Juicy, perfectly ripened slices of watermelon on a hot day, with a little sprinkle of salt or Tajin seasoning
51. Putting on a fresh pair of brand-new socks
52. Putting on some gotch¹ with the exact and optimal fitted contours and dimensions for exemplary containment and comfort, preferably from just out of the dryer
53. Finding shoes that actually fit my strangely configured feet
54. Meeting a goal and crossing it off a checklist: no matter how small or trivial – it’s accomplishment
55. Watching young kids learn things using all their senses, attention, and fascination, and listening to some of the interesting questions and observations they come up with
56. Hikes through the wilderness (foraging for stuff)
57. Discovering new ways of not wasting stuff (energy, food, water, discarded material, etc.)
58. Fishing (especially if there is a prize catch)
59. My bathrobe, and having cozy days when I don’t have to wear anything else but that; being liberated from wearing pants at its finest
60. Long soaks in the tub full of Espom salts (feeling relieved more than happy)
61. Playing Scrabble
62. Playing Backgammon
63. Trips to food shops with strange and exotic merchandise
64. Connecting to foreign strangers when I greet and thank them in their native language
65. Swimming in the ocean: I discovered that I can actually float and (sort of) swim in saltwater
66. Seeing pictures of some of my friends’ babies
67. Puppies – you truly would have to be some kind of soulless psychopathic monster if you don’t find puppies adorable
68. Running – if done right, one does indeed experience a runner’s high
69. The best part of running: pulling off the shoes afterward, super endorphin rush there
70. The first new snow of winter: the only minute fraction about winter I like apart from . . .
71.  Christmas
72. Seeing the winter landscapes covered with hoarfrost
73. The unique winter solstice my girlfriend and I celebrate: Yule Bookfest
74. Cannabis is legal here in Canada - even though I myself am a non-user, I’m happy when stupidly archaic, overly punitive, and useless laws and prohibitions get repealed
75. Universal healthcare in this nation, with Pharmacare in the works as a possible reality here too in the near future
76. My laptop computer
77. My smartphone
78. The internet
79. The wonderful electrical and telecommunications networks we have for making all this stuff work
80. The mobility that all points 76 to 80 allow me in this country
81. The fact that I can drink the tap water here
82. Whenever I don’t have to wake up to an alarm clock
83. Functioning flush toilets
84. Reliable postal service (live outside of Canada for a while in a developing country fraught with mail theft, and it becomes something that you won’t ever take for granted ever again)
85. Fresh fruit and vegetables when in season
86. Owls – for no other reason than I just think that they are uniquely evolved and fascinating types of birds of prey. Creatures with proportionately huge eyes to body size capture my attention in general
87. The kind of technology that comes around that makes you wonder how you were ever able to survive without it
88. Infographic and flowcharts that better allow me to visualize data
89. I have air conditioning in my home (and car) if I need it
90. It doesn’t get to be plus 40 degrees with 95% humidity here (I can tolerate -40 with -50 wind chill over that
91. I have a perfectly sized living space that’s adequate for my needs
92. A super heavy quilt to crawl under in winter evenings, especially after . . . 
93. Nordic skiing
94. For cooking, realizing the combinatorial mathematics in crafting and blending things up for stuff like toppings for pizza, fillings for a sandwich, or seasonings and marinades for barbequing. When it comes down to it, you can ultimately have an infinite selection for any pizza, sandwich, or BBQ, or at least more than you’ll ever get to sample in your entire lifetime. It’s mindful abundance at its best
95. Perhaps a silly detail to include, but I’m happy to have something like insurance. I hope that I ultimately won’t need to use it for some disaster
96. Happy to be living in a city with lots of parks and greenspace
97. Single malt scotch (not too smoky, with more notes of caramel and aged leather), a decadent pleasure
98. Margaritas: the only tolerable way to consume tequila  
99. I have my own washer and dryer in my suite, and there’s no more need to experience the hell of using a public laundromat
100. The sound of Ella snoring: because she’s an old girl, it let’s me know that she’s still alive
101. Slipping on a bunnyhug² once the evening chill comes on
102. My commute is only 12 minutes by car, 20 minutes by bike
103. Peeling a tangerine in one long intact piece of rind, crumpling that up and giving that a squeeze, and smelling the aroma of it. It immediately takes me to a happy place
104. Cheese and pickles, in any form
105. Discovering when any species of wildlife has been taken off the endangered species list
106. My pantry and freezer: both are always full of options that prevent both boredom and starvation
107. The Saskatoon Public Library: I love free reading materials, plus exercising my intellectual freedom
108. Alternately, all the bookshops in Saskatoon
109. Scientific and historical non-fiction, especially material written by Michael Pollan, and Bill Bryson
110. Novels by Jonas Jonasson (the funniest Swedish author ever; if there are funnier, please let me know)
111. Technological, medical (and overall social) advances and breakthroughs that bring more independence, ability, and access to the world for people with various disabilities.
112. Perusing national and global statistics, making comparisons in terms of what can be linked to progress and overall wellness (incredibly nerdy stuff, but hey, that’s just me being me!)
113. Cozy darkness, involving various forms of snuggling
114. My leisure time coffee (sugar and cream), otherwise I take it black while at work
115. My rockabilia T-shirt collection
116. Interesting logic and math puzzles
117. All the powerful and constructive things that can be done with a simple pen and paper, and a little imagination
118. Success stories involving the implementation of greener, cleaner, alternative energy technologies, and efforts to better recycle and repurpose the waste we’ve already left on this planet
119. The concept and practice of etherealization: being able to do more with less material and energy
120. Jeopardy!, bar room trivia contests, and other ways to bleed off the pressure from all the trivial facts building up in my head (making otherwise useless information potentially useful, even if the outcome is just scoring some winning free drinks)
121. Road trips when driving isn’t too overstimulating (Saskatchewan is perfect for this)
122. Lastly, for now, the simple fact that when I encounter people who are greedy and yet wasteful consumers, and who may start to judge me; thinking that they are somehow superior to me because I have less than them, I can counter back to them saying that I have something that they don’t seem to have. That is, that I have the knowledge that I already have enough. Sure, more is nice, but enough is a good start. The constant pursuit of more often just brings more unhappiness because you have more to protect, defend, and ultimately worry about. It’s another good lesson that I acquired from this book.

Standing back and re-reading all this, the thing I notice about this list is that most of this stuff is achievable for very little, or no money at all, so it should not be that hard to find happiness. Nothing on here is really centred on politics or religious beliefs, or some other thing that’s generally seen as a violation to another’s sense of well-being; which for me is the base all the crap that makes the news so unbearably ridiculous to watch. I quit deluding myself in thinking that those things will ever make me happier. That’s the stuff that anchors people to their negative thoughts and beliefs, to give themselves permission to seize and hold on to some prejudice, or otherwise actively postponing happiness until condition X, or other variable, is met, (utterly stupid stuff like, for example: “Oh I’ll be happy when X is voted out of (or into) office, I just have to wait through the four years for that to happen and endure the misery and react with conflictive drama that I chose to dream up and speculate for it”; “I’ll be happy when they get tough on all these X people from doing Y behaviour(s), by taking Z action(s) on them. Hell, I’ll even support some measures of authoritarian fascism to have that happen.”, or “I’ll be happy when I meet my lord X, (Jesus, Allah, or some other dreamt up omnipotent patriarchal monarch figure) in heaven! I just have to wait out the rest of my lifetime being sanctimonious, hypocritical, wishing ill on non-believers, and following cult teachings until that may happen”. Those are just coping mechanisms at best; embracing such things rarely sets up a stage for any period of lasting contentment, especially when you are constantly facing people with differing or polar opposite opinions and ideas than you have.

A list of a hundred and twenty-two items is a pretty good start, and after listing all this I do indeed at least have some elevated spirits, despite still being stricken with a cold. There is more stuff yet, but it’s too personal to post here. I should continue and aim for 365 items after posting this, so there is at least one thing for every day of the year to be grateful for. I’m now happy that I’m a third of the way there (#123).

1.1.Gotch – Canadian English colloquialism meaning men’s underwear

2.2.Bunnyhug – Saskatchewan English, meaning a pullover hooded jersey

5Q5A: Summer Vacation 2019

I’ve been fortunate to have booked time off for holidays for this part of summer that coincide with those of my girlfriend. We spent this past Fathers’ Day Sunday at my parents’ place; having a good visit with them. On the way back home, we talked about this and that in terms of how we were going to use the rest of the days during the time off: for things and events both together as a couple, and for each others’ personal time separately. She asked me if I did any blogging lately, and it struck me that I didn’t write or post anything for the longest while. I have no answer as to why such a lapse happened, except for the fact that sharing the delightful company with such a lovely, intelligent, and talented person occupies more of my thoughts and time now; I’ve been finding more solace in that now than I do in any writing. To keep myself focused, I resume the rest of this entry in 5Q5A format.


Q1. What whammies am I having to deal with this time around for this summer holiday?


A1. It never fails. I always seem to get some curve ball pitched at me that serves to be some obstacle to contend with, impeding me from having a completely blissful summer holiday; mostly in the form of unwelcome and unexpected expenses needed to rectify something requiring immediate attention. It has been becoming a repeated and inevitable cycle annually: a regular expectation that some freakish issue or series of unfortunate events will manifest themselves to make this happen. Last year, it was emergency surgery for my dog. This year, the (sometimes excruciating) state of my own knees and hips demanded that I replace some orthotics immediately (it greatly also affects how active I can be). Add to that, there is a malfunctioning dishwasher (drainage issues) to fix now. Instead of freely frolicking around elsewhere, I’m now relegated to take a crash course in how to be an appliance technician, or someone who may need to call a certified one if I can’t fix the problem myself. No functioning dishwasher means no way to properly sanitize bottles and equipment for beermaking: the other project I wanted to do this week. Added to that are repercussions of work-related issues that I choose not to explain here. It’s most definitely an unsatisfactory use of part of my holiday time. However, I do keep myself grounded by reminding myself that whatever problems I have during this time, they are pretty darn minimal compared to most those of the people I work for.


Q2. What cerebral things are becoming entertaining this time around (things in the mind that one can do that don’t need a specific or physical time and place)?


A2. Lately, I’ve been becoming intrigued with learning more of the nuances of poker: Texas Hold’em poker specifically. Aside from playing the actual game itself, it’s also a playful challenge in mastering being able to mentally wrangle things like the hole card rankings, pot odds, and putting other charts, tables, and other statistics into some mnemonic order. The technical side of playing the game (playing a tighter game) has improved a lot for me; the psychological (mastering effective bluffing) part of the game will always be a work in progress. I’m giving it a break for now; not allowing it to become an unhealthy, addictive, obsession.


Q3. If expense and travel time weren’t factors, what would have the plans otherwise been?

A3. Probably going on a road trip to Waterton Lakes National Park – getting away from this drought zone and enjoying the Rocky Mountain air may do us both some good.


Q4. If instead then resorting to cheap(er) thrills, what are they?


A4. Checking out and exploring the yet unvisited and unknown local shops in and out of town that cater to our eclectic and esoteric interests; and fashioning the odd little feast for us to indulge in throughout the week is also in the works. Using my moments of solitude, like this one, in my mornings and afternoons just be content to sit outside and chill out, playing my favourite music, with either coffee/beer/strong badass cocktails, with my laptop or notebooks, plotting my own little schemes of world domination for new world order (at least for my own little singular point of this world anyway).


Q5. What is the happiness being enjoyed in the here and now?
  

A5. At this moment, making a pleasant discovery about my dishwasher and being able to announce and exclaim, “Yay! The <bleep>ing thing drained completely!!!”, to my girlfriend in a text message. It’s like I successfully passed some sort of adulting test through appliance repair. Now I’m relieved and freer to enjoy the rest of this week in peace.


Addendum: I found and started reading a book later in the day about happiness; which itself seems like a fitting thing to do on a holiday. The Happiness Equation by Neil Pasricha was my chosen non-fiction read of the week. One of the better lessons in it is that you should never make yourself too busy for the dear people who matter to you.